Friday, May 18, 2012

Winds of Change...


I remember a time when I, a young boy with little else to do on a weekend afternoon, would walk out to the end of my driveway, take several deep breaths, raise my hands into the air, and proceed to conduct the wind. And unlike my bouts with Poseidon (see Games with the God of the Sea), this was no competition with a God. Once my hands were up, I was in control. No games this time. I was determined, and this was my practice, to change the course of the wind.

Nobody saw me do this. At least, I was never aware of anyone watching me. If there had been anyone peeking out through the blinds, they might have just assumed I was doing something that weird only children do from time to time. Even if this was so, it wouldn’t have bothered me any. Let’s see them make the wind change direction on command.

It is a sad truth I must admit that in growing up, I have forgotten how to use my gift. Instead I learned to conduct music. I learned to use wind, my breath, to play an instrument and sing. I learned that most people cannot, in fact, control the wind at all outside of breathing. They simply have to take it in whatever direction it comes. How sad for them, I used to think.

But it wasn’t long before I began to doubt my own abilities. For the longest time I knew I had forgotten the technique I used to make a gust of wind shift course, but I had never questioned that I did at one time know how. Searching my memories, I would start to see myself as my neighbors may have seen me. I would see myself, an only child doing a funny looking dance. Why is he holding his hands up to the air? What is he saying to himself? How strange…

I had been taken away from my magick.

It’s been a good long while since I’ve thought about this. What has changed in me, I can’t say, but I know something has changed. Or perhaps I’ve changed back. Now when I close my eyes and remember those times, I can clearly recall every flick of the wrist and every uttered command. I remember most of all that the wind did listen.

How long now have I spent simply allowing myself to float wherever the wind takes me? No more, I say!

I will walk out to the end of my driveway. My breath with be deep, my arms will be raised, and my sails will be set. I’m taking my gift back.

I choose the direction in which the wind will blow me today. I choose North towards New York City.

I hope you’re ready up there. A strong wind is heading your way.

4 comments:

  1. Good luck, Brogan! I'm sure you'll be amazing in NYC!!

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  2. I love everything about this: the image of a younger you wrangling the wind into submission at the end of your driveway, juxtaposed against an older you reclaiming control of your destiny. You need a baton worse than anyone I know. :o) New York City better brace itself....

    So proud of you, and sending so much love. <3

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    1. I graciously accept your love, and I send you a huge amount in return. Also...I once had a baton of my own. It was beautiful, and I thought of it as a wand that created magickal sounds. Then freshman year it got broken in half. It was a sad day for wands and batons everywhere.

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