Online Gay-ting...

In this modern world of ours, many people turn to the online dating scene to meet people. Perhaps our lives are too busy. Perhaps society is changing in ways that make meeting people in conventional ways much more difficult. Perhaps we want to hide behind a screen until we feel comfortable enough to actually approach someone else. Whatever the case, my experiences in the online gay dating scene have been...interesting. So naturally I wrote a poem to express my feelings about it. Happy Monday Fun Day! Enjoy.

Online Gay-ting:

Hey there faceless torso.

How are you today?

For someone left without a head

You have a lot to say.

“Sup?” “What’s good?” “You lookin, bro?”

Or sometimes even “Hey.”

Such scintillating conversation

In this dating pool of gay.

Hello fuzzy butt crack

You’re looking mighty bare.

At least you might after a trim,

Some tender love and care.

Forgive me if I don’t respond

But just so you’re aware.

It’s hard to focus on your words

When air is all you wear.

Howdy rock hard penis

Of unique shape and size.

It’s funny how you blend right in

With all these other guys.

True some are soft, just hanging there

Slack between their thighs.

You all just start to look the same

To my bombarded eyes.

Oh hello happy smile

Contagious through the screen.

Let’s read some of your profile

And see what we can glean.

You only want a “real man”

Have no interest in “the scene.”

You profess desire for a “masc.”

When mask is what you mean.

I’d like to know your name first

Before you ask to bone.

I don’t intend to send you pics

By email or by phone.

Wading through the sea of sluts

My love life I bemoan.

Thanks to you I’ve come to think

I’m better off alone.

So on I click from page to page

Saying hi along the way.

I pray to someday feel desired

As more than simply prey.

My feet are ready to be swept

Though that may sound cliché.

I still have faith it can be done

In this dating pool of gay.